You merely acted as a servant in your roll.
Lifting me up to share in carrying the weight of my issues and proving, to me, that I can rebuild my own wings, I am capable of fixing these broken things. You gave me desperately needed space to heal, so that I could build the strength to face my shadows.
You were never my light, you were a reflection of the light within me. The light securely keeping the darkness at bay, and you were my ferryman, leading me to its gate.
The experience with healing has not been gentle, it’s not been kind, I’ve had to break furthur than before, before I could access my knotted core.
No, you were not my darkness nor my light, you were merely a guide.
In the past I’ve blamed you for your roll in my pain, for opening me up and leaving my demons to consume me… but now I’ve come through. I’ve regained clarity and for that I cherish you. For lighting me up and for letting me fall, I appreciate your ability to fulfill your roll.
It wasn’t easier for you, watching me writhe within the consumption of my own plague, you could have walked away. I’d even beg and provoke you to.
“For better or for worse” through pain and blame you stayed and we came through. Beaten and robbed of years and youth, but we made it to the other side.
No, I don’t hate you. I’ll never hate you for your strength and sacrifice, for stoically standing in lonely abandonment, yet never aborting the chore. I’ll never hate you for allowing yourself to be a transporter in a journey so much bigger than you…
I’m lonely, but, I won’t hate you.
I don’t blame you anymore. There is no one to blame. There is no fault to divide, only knowledge and experience and growth to have gained. It’s been a painful and wonderful ride, there’s not another person who would have taken this course with me, and I’m thankful.
Our connection on this plane has not met its end at this journey, only transformed into new personas to prepare for what’s next.
As we continue to exist as passengers in this human experience, I continue to be grateful for you as a companion on my ride.
The nature of our designations may have changed, but:
“Progress is impossible without change” – George Bernard Shaw
Relationships In Reality 